A General Theory of Love
by Thomas;Amini, Fari;Lannon, Richard Lewis
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Book Reviews of A General Theory of Love
Book Review: Good news and Bad news
Summary: 2 Stars
Which do you want first? The good news is that many times during the reading of the book I wanted to call the authors up and schedule an appointment to turn my life around, stop being so depressed and learn to love again. The bad news is the premise is based on some faulty assumptions. First, much time is spent knocking Freud and his sexual and parental theories (Oedipus, etc.) and then the authors turn around and say that all of our problems are based on our parents and stem from childhood. Secondly, as another reviewer pointed out, the authors completely ignore the influence of the media and peers for child development. Having raised three sons (now 12, 20, & 22), I can trace my role in their development and upbringing almost exclusively to genetic and some minor environmental effect. The rest of who they are comes from the media and their peers. The web, television, movies, and friends are the source for 90% of their information. When they are younger, their teachers are always right and when older their parents are always wrong. Thirdly, although informative, their descriptions of monkey experiments were appalling and hard to stomach. Of course, now I know why I used to sit and bang my head on the sidewalk, because the monkey ignored by its mother did the same. But did a monkey have to be tortured to death to figure this out? And how will knowing this help me be less depressed and learn to love better?Book Review: A brilliant, angry flawed critically important book
Summary: 4 Stars
Lewis and his colleagues have presented a generally accurate review of the function of the limbic system in social attachment, applying it to an emotion that the human species has defined as "love", as if love does not exist in other mammals - although I think they make it clear that it does.
The writing style is elegant, nuanced, clever and metaphorical, probably better suited to a Steinbeck novel than to a lay treatise on neuroscience. It's the first book in a long time where I had to go to the dictionary for a few words. That said, their emphasis on the critical importance of maternal/infant attachment as the basic requirement for personality development and the ultimate ability to love is right on the mark.
Their despair over the subjugation of this instinctual bond by the emerging tenets of American society addresses an issue of monumental importance to 21st century American culture. They might have addressed the disturbing epidemic of ADD, autism, bipolar disorder, attachment disorder, violence and depression in our under-10 children as an expression of our society's abandonment of our infants through current childbirth techniques, maternal/neonatal separation, decline of breast feeding and daycare under the age of 12 months. All in all, this is a critically important book that should be required reading for us and especially the leaders of our institutions.
Book Review: There are other ways to achieve limbic reshaping
Summary: 5 Stars
This is a terrific book, and they cover a lot of ground, add to the paradigm through their synthesis of the available science. I had hoped to see more about the possibilities suggested by the idea of limbic reshaping; these guys are psychiatrists, so naturally their point of view suggests that it is the psychiatrists who are the ones to do this.
But what about the internal intersections? Is there no pathway or intersection between the 3 sections of the brain? The authors seem to suggest that there is - but there is no discussion about this internal traffic, no suggestion of any observation of it or its effects.
Other research on the plasticity of the brain suggests that it can change itself. Meditators have been claiming the ability, and there is data to support them. What about the spiritual realm, the realm of religion, or faith? The very idea of faith, the idea of a love of the abstraction of God, has been observed to have a profound effect in the human heart, spirit and mind... if they can observe this though brain imaging, and measure its effects in meaningful physiological ways, wouldn't it seem that there is the opportunity for a whole new science of self-healing?
Maybe in the next book...
Book Review: Some good info but some could find bottom line depressing
Summary: 3 Stars
If you're unemployed and didn't grow up in an ideal environment stay far, far away from this book. On the other hand, if you're looking for hard data to support an arguement to stay home with your baby, this is it. There's so much good information in this book that it's a shame that it leads to a conclusion where serious and permenant damage to children and society in general seems blamed on the working mom. Read thouroughly, it's hard documentation about how environment affects neural development. However this could easily be quoted dangerously and could turn the tide on what little progress women have made since the 50's.
I'd like to believe that the brain develops throughout a lifetime. With this book, it's as if there's a brain 'ideal' that if not achieved through effective bonding, leaves a person socialy handicapped for life. I'd recomend this to professionals who can apply the findings from the extensive studies to counsel their patients. For the average person trying to gain a better understanding of what makes them tick, consider "A User's Guide to the Brain" instead. It focuses more on understanding neurology in a positive manner that offers hope.
Book Review: Great writing and Great insights to us
Summary: 5 Stars
I am a social worker and not a research scientist or from academia. However, I am fascinated by our new understanding of how our relationship to ourselves and attachment to others is affected by how our brain has been wired. The author's information here seems to support similar theories I have read in such as books as "Symphony in the Brain" and "Change your Brain Change your Life." Recent discoveries indicate the brain is more plastic than rigidly set. This opens up so many fascinating therapies, beyond just insight therapy and shotgun drug intervention, using very specific chemical and electrical interactions of our brain to restructure it. I do not always agree with some of their more cynical conclusions on human change. I do believe they do offer a clear and lyrically written concept that will help you to understand yourself and others better. The writing and quotations are spectacular. Be prepared to read words that you may never have used, so keep a dictionary near. If you are a psychotherapist or worked with a good one then the chapter, Between Stone and Sky, will reveal that lyrical dance between patient and practitioner exquistely.