A New Guide to Rational Living
by Albert Ellis, Robert A. Harper
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Book Reviews of A New Guide to Rational Living
Book Review: Words of wisdom
Summary: 5 Stars
This book has something for everyone. Although I am not depressed and don't consider myself to have "a problem", I learned a great deal from this book. I have redefined a lot of "musts", "oughts" and "shoulds" that I had created for myself. I really like the part where the authors recommend the readers to focus on the enjoyment of doing things rather than focus on being good at them. Especially defeating is to work at something in order to become better than others. Another great point is trying to direct less negative energy towards what other people do and how they choose to act. In a democracy, they may do as they please, and is it really worth the time and effort to try and make them change? Or even worse, just upset yourself about it, without even considering to influence them to change? There is a woman in my yoga class that always irritated me by commenting on everything we did in class and sometimes brought things to eat into the exercise room. Instead of directing energy towards her behavior and on how she was influencing the effects of my training in a negative way, I should have been minding my own business and not let myself be bothered. It really is no big deal, it was just all in my head.
Read this book, not matter who you are.
Book Review: If you only read -one- book this decade...
Summary: 5 Stars
Ancient as it may be (orginally published in 1961) in a field where "current" almost always means "superior owing to more recent discovery," Ellis's -Guide...- is the bomb if you're going to -do- cognitive, evidence-based therapy, as either a therapist or a patient.
His ten screwy ideas are nothing short of the unfortunate attitudinal watershed of the decline of Western culture. Identified, questioned, examined, uprooted and replaced with more realistic -- and functional -- notions, they can become the foundation for a belief and appraisal system by which anyone can cope with pretty much any curve ball life pitches at them.
However radical, as well as grandiosely expressed some of his ideas may seem; Basco, Beck, Seligman, Wessler, Young and all who have ridden on his coattails owe a debt to Albert... not to mention the millions whose lives have been saved and/or greatly improved by disovering for themselves how things really -are-... as opposed to what they -think- they are.
There are a lot of Ellis-authored books available, but having read several of them (as well as many of Aaron Beck's), it seems to me that this one stands out as the seminal piece for professional and lay readers alike. This is Ellis at his no-holds-barred, free-wheeling, no-nonsense best.
Book Review: Can't argue with results!
Summary: 5 Stars
After continually searching for the reason I was feeling overwhelmed all the time, I think I found it. It is rooted in Irrational belief #2, as referred to in this guide -- the idea that you have to be totally competent and achieving. Constantly believing this led me to perceive that nothing I was ever doing was enough, and also led me to compare myself with everyone to see who had achieved more. Overall, I would feel great when I fared better than someone but would become unnerved when I was worse off. This book helped me to see how destructive and unproductive this is. The authors go as far as calling people with this sort of irrational belief "disturbed." I didn't like that much until I realized that it is essentially true -- there is no benefit or reason to hold such distorted ideas. Now that I am aware of where my "disturbed" thoughts are stemming from, I can put an end to them by dispelling my irrational belief. If your life is not where you want it to be, then there is a good chance it has to do with some irrational belief you've got buried in your thought process. Getting to the bottom of my unhappiness was priceless!Book Review: "Step Three" On Your Road Away From Neuroticism
Summary: 5 Stars
Step One: getting past your ego defenses at least enough to see that your problem is you. Step Two: understanding when, where and how you went wrong (cognitive behavior theory recommended). Step Three: figuring out what to do about it ... how to dump your unhappy, self-destructive behaviors so you can move on into a happier, more self-fulfilling future.
Albert Ellis suggests that "bibliotherapy" (self-help through reading) can be markedly effective for all but the most seriously upset, as opposed to the time and expense of conventional counseling or therapy. His book "A Guide to Rational Living" isn't new, but it's still one of the best guides for anyone ready for "Step Three". This isn't a clinical treatise abounding with "shrink-speak", but something more akin to a very erudite grandfatherly talk ... a conversation that contains a lot more common sense than nebulous theory, with wisdom that you'll find immediately useful. When it comes to "bibliotherapy", there are hundreds of books you could add to your library, with more being published every month. Don't mistake this one as being outdated. Make it one of your first reads.
Book Review: A life-simplifying approach
Summary: 4 Stars
This book was "prescribed" to me by a therapist when I was struggling with a rebellious teenage stepson. The approach of Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy is to interrupt the cycle of destructive thinking that keeps us locked in unhealthy attitudes and behaviors. In this approach, it is not necessary to define deep-seated reasons for the behavior, but to recognize it as it is and to take corrective action. With time, our new healthy thinking becomes habitual as well.
After a few introductory chapters, several chapters follow that deal with specific situations, such as anxiety and panic, fear of failure, and self blame. All are very helpful.
I noticed, however, and the therapist agreed with me, that after a few chapters it gets repetative. You can read a few chapters dealing the most specifically with your situation, and have a firm grasp of the overall approach. Then it comes time to start living it! No book can change your life just by reading it, but this book gave me a framework that helped saved my relationship with my stepson.