On Becoming Baby Wise, Book 1: Learn How Over One Million Babies Were Trained to Sleep Through the Night the Natural Way
by Dr. Robert Bucknam, Gary Ezzo
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Book Summary Information
Author: Dr. Robert Bucknam, Gary EzzoEdition: Paperback
Audio: English (Unknown); English (Original Language); English (Published)
Published: 1998-05-01
ISBN: 1576734587
Number of pages: 223
Publisher: Multnomah Books
Book Reviews of On Becoming Baby Wise, Book 1: Learn How Over One Million Babies Were Trained to Sleep Through the Night the Natural Way
Book Review: not practical
Summary: 2 Stars
This book frustrates me because it incites people to either say the whole thing is crap, or that it's the best thing to happen to parenthood. It's neither. But I do think it's dangerous. About me - I am a Christian. My children have a schedule. My children have never cried unanswered at night (sometimes during the day if I have to wipe a toddler's butt or what have you, I am only one person!). My one year old sleeps from 8-5, has a small feed (I get up at 5 and chose this), and goes back to sleep until 7. My two year old sleeps from 8-7, no night waking, and if she does, she gets her cup of water, and happily goes back to sleep. About once a month, she will come to our room and ask for something. I happily oblige. I am, after all, still a parent, no matter what the clock says.
Read the reviews. Everyone that likes it immediately jumps to say "my baby slept through the night by x number of weeks." That's great. But it's not an accurate measure of a healthy baby. In fact, no one, not even a baby, sleeps through the night. You wake, resituate, go back to bed. When a parent of a 7 week old baby says their baby sleeps through the night, what they mean is that they have taught their baby not to bother to cry for them whether they are hungry, cold, wet (I assume these babies are wet, as most babies wet their diapers overnight, it's why huggies makes an overnight diaper). They have successfully taught their babies to roll over and suffer in silence. Great parenting. You are off to a magnificent start!
Parent directed feeding is not so awful. Sort of. I think his point is that you can choose nursing times and encourage your child to nurse at these times. I don't think the way to do this is to make your hungry baby wait. I know, I know, he says to feed a hungry baby. Right after he tells stories with dire warnings about the poor, stupid parents who let their babies feed whenever they "demanded." I mean, how seriously can you take his instruction to feed a hungry baby when he has just condemned all women who DO feed their babies when they are hungry??? (By the way, he also intentionally misleads parents about what demand feeding really is - demand feeding is really just recognizing your baby's hunger signs and feeding them when they show them, signs like sucking hands, rooting, etc. Demand feeding is NOT waiting until your baby is crying to feed them) If I have a feeding scheduled at 11, and my baby is hungry at 10:30, I will feed her! I will give her a top off snack, attempting to feed on one side, perhaps. Regardless, I will STILL feed her at 11. If you feed her at 11 every day, even if she is only a little hungry, she will get accustomed to eating at 11. But if you feed her snacks in between, SHE WILL STILL BE HUNGRY AT 11 because that's what she's used to. If he presented it that way, but instead he scares parents into feeding on a schedule.
Lastly, perhaps this is picky. But I let my babies feed themselves table fopd. Babies are learning, and one thing they can learn about is food. To a baby, eating is more than hand to mouth. It is experiencing the taste, texture, mushability, etc of food. Sometimes it's messy.
Also, his portrayal of those awful attachment parents is LAUGHABLE! Oh my. I think it's in childwise that he tells a story about a mom who, scared to tell her children no, disassembels the outdoor playset and brings it inside since it was raining and her children want to play on it. Uh, no. Just no. Attachment parenting can be, and is often, taken to extremes (as people do with this book), but the general principle is respecting your baby as an individual and assisting their entrance into the world by recognizing that their needs are urgent. His description of attachment parents is a description of bad parents, who refuse to set boundaries. I am not an attachment parent, really, but the ones I know aren't afraid to tell their children no. They just don't say no because they can, they actually have a reason to say no. They don't pull the "Because I said so" card.
I think this book is great for parents that don't want the inconvenience of having a baby. If this sounds like you, get a puppy. Or adopt an older child. Having a baby (or a child for that matter) is a 24 hour a day job, and just because YOU want to sleep doesn't mean that tiny baby wants to, or even can. You try falling asleep when you're not tired.
But perhaps the biggest turn off for this book is listening to it's die hard followers. Nowhere in their comments do you hear a genuine joy and delight in their baby as a person. It's about how conveniently their babies fit into their lives. There's no room for YOU the ADULT and YOU the PARENT changing your priorities and routines. Just forcing your baby to adapt to YOUR schedule. It's all about what a "good" baby they have, and how well behaved the baby is, and how quickly the baby slept through the night. Babies are pure joy, they are screaming, poopy, crazy, hair pulling beautiful bundles of joy, and I wouldn't trade mine even for a full night's sleep.
More On Becoming Baby Wise, Book 1: Learn How Over One Million Babies Were Trained to Sleep Through the Night the Natural Way reviews:
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Summary of On Becoming Baby Wise, Book 1: Learn How Over One Million Babies Were Trained to Sleep Through the Night the Natural Way
Every parent who has welcomed a child into the world understands the longing to find a way to teach their baby to sleep contentedly and continually. This book is an exciting infant management plan that suc-cessfully trains children to sleep through the night. from a bounty hunter in this novel for 10-14 years olds.en.tudy today.Theologian Gary Ezzo and pediatrician Dr. Robert Bucknam set off cries of alarm in their highly controversial 1995 publication On Becoming Baby Wise by arguing that some crying is natural and healthy for babies. In this updated edition, Ezzo and Bucknam present a comprehensive method to encourage a full night's sleep for the seven- to nine-week-old baby. It's easy to read, easy to follow, supported by research and by testimonials from parents and pediatricians, and includes suggestions for making the process fit into the reader's lifestyle. The authors believe a consistent sleep routine leads to happier, more responsible, and better-adjusted children. But a full night's sleep is just the short-term goal. The long-term goal is training parents to bring order and stability to their families through nurturing the marriage, providing a loving structure for one's children, and allowing flexibility in the process.
Twelve chapters cover feeding philosophies, monitoring baby's growth, establishing baby's routine, handling multiple births, and the ever-controversial chapter on when baby cries. The 52-week method involves four phases, beginning with "Stabilization" from birth to week 8. During weeks 9 through 15 ("Extended Night"), babies learn to sleep through the night. Ezzo and Bucknam attempt to teach the difference between a baby's many cries and advise parents on various responses to these cries. Critics dislike Ezzo's strong belief that "child-centered parenting" (feeding baby whenever it cries, sleeping with and "wearing" baby) fosters demanding, insecure toddlers. But for parents who are tired of being tired--or whose previous experience with child-centered parenting supports Ezzo's theory--it may be worth a read. --Liane Thomas
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