The Five Love Languages of Children
by Gary D. Chapman, Ross Campbell, Ross Campbell MD
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Book Reviews of The Five Love Languages of Children
Book Review: Outstanding book on parenting with Christian perspective
Summary: 5 Stars
The 5 Love Languages of Children by Gary D. Chapman & Ross Campbell is another installment in Chapman's excellent Love Languages series. I've read the book for couples and the one for teens, and both helped me understand my family much better. The premise is that each person has a primary love language (the five being: physical touch, words of affirmation, acts of service, quality time, and gifts) and to fully fill somone's love tank, we need to speak their language. Unfortunately, we all too often speak our own language fluently, but if that's not the language of the child, they don't feel loved and it leads to resentment on both sides. Chapman does a wonderful job of giving examples of how to figure out your child's love language as well as ideas for learning to speak it. There's also information on discipline and handling anger. There is so much good parenting packed into this slim book! Since reading the book, I've been able to understand my own children better, and I've seen changes in them. These are lessons to be learned and clung to.Book Review: Christian worldview, not based on research
Summary: 1 Stars
This book may appear like the studied work of psychology professionals, but they bring a not-so-hidden Christian worldview that expresses itself in moralizing and patriarchal tones. For instance, the authors talk about how a father expressing love to his daughter to helps her steer clear of "unwholesome" activity. While there are a million good reasons why a parent would be concerned about his teen child being sexually active, labeling it "unwholesome" brings a huge set of judgments to the situation. And these authors do not seem to be aware of their own biases - they seem to accept the Christian worldview as fact. In any case, using judgmental labels is not the pathway to unconditional love - the very outcome the authors are trying to champion.
This book also lacks citations, which suggests there is little real research behind their work and just a lot of opinionating.
If you want parenting or relationship books based on actual research and science, try "Raising An Emotionally Intelligent Child" by John Gottman.
Book Review: quick easy read, yet great info
Summary: 4 Stars
This book made a lot of sense as it described the 5 ways the people in my life (not just my children) give and receive love. As a busy at-home mother of 3 that are age 3 and under, I am already formulating little ways throughout the day to efficiently make my children feel loved that won't keep me from getting my daily work done! It includes a brief chapter on the single-parent household and also one of a typical marriage and how our children learn to behave as adults from us.
I was disappointed in the small amount of info on how to effectively discipline based on which love langage a child is - it basically says 'don't use the love-language of that individual child or they'll think they don't love you instead of just being disciplined', such as don't spank a physically affectionate child and don't speak harshly to a "verbal" child. I was hoping for more alternative ideas that can be effective for each child based on their love-language.
Book Review: children revealed
Summary: 5 Stars
Parenting is very hard and the most important lesson as parents that we can teach our children are skills in successful relationships and loving one another. As it says in his first book "5 love languages" - Relationships are more meaningful than accomplishments. Children are so hard to figure out most of the time. Any help in relating to them better and creating a stronger bond that will last a lifetime is a priceless treasure. This book encourages gentleness, compassion, the importance of listening and the validity of each precious childs thoughts, emotions and feelings. By studying this book,you will be able to successfully help lay the foundation of who they will become- how they manage their own emotions, solve problems and cope with the challenges that life throws them. All of which are found in how we treat others, how we deal with anger and disappointment and how well we express these emotions with another person.Book Review: Great Book to Increase Your Understanding Of Children
Summary: 5 Stars
The Five Love Languages of Children is a wonderful parental guide to understanding your childrens' behavior and how it relates to their emotional needs. I'm not one to read all the parenting books written by so-called specialists, but this one is really informative, makes sense, and is easy to apply. My son was having some behavioral issues and this book helped me understand that his primary love language is "Quality Time;" something which he was lacking since my daughter was born. Based on what I learned about his needs related to his primary love language, I have increased my quality time with him and have changed my method of consequence. It helped me realize that I was punishing him for his poor behavior choices, instead of disciplining him, which was a real eye-opener. Although his behavior has not totally turned around, we are on the right track, and will keep working with what we've learned!