The Gallery of Regrettable Food
by James Lileks
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Book Reviews of The Gallery of Regrettable Food
Book Review: A Cure for Modern Ills
Summary: 5 Stars
Had a rough day? Stressed about the looming Apocalypse and your dwindling bank balance? You need James Lileks. You need The Gallery of Regrettable Food -- actual food illustrations and photography from the Depression through the swinging 70s. There are a few recipes, but the focus is on the unappetizing pictures and Lileks's delicious commentary. Imagine the mind that could dream up hot dogs in aspic. No, don't. Not if you're eating. Or about to eat. Or ever want to eat again.
Most of the content in Lileks's books is no longer on the website, but truly they are worth buying. He describes a loaf of mottled red meat sludge in aspic as "a core sample from a mass grave." He tells the hidden stories of the people in those illustrations. Truly, he is the MST3K of old advertisements -- and his wit is as sharp as his eye.
The effect of reading anything by Lileks is, first, laughter, tinged with horror. Then, as you read on, uncontrollable spasms of laughter. Then choking, screaming convulsions of something that might be laughter or agony, garnished by tears. Then full-fledged hysteria. It's absolutely guaranteed, and it's one of the best ways I know for dealing with a horrible day.
Why yes, I had a . . . regrettable day. Any day in which one's automobile, freshly emerged from the shelter of a warranty period, demands repairs that will cost almost a month's rent (which, incidentally, has just been raised again), that day cries out for Official Cheer.
(It worked, too.)
Book Review: REGRETTABLE FOODS... HOW ABOUT FATAL FOODS!
Summary: 5 Stars
This book is definitely one of my all-time favourites. If you happen to be a product of the 50's or 60's, you will probably remember your mother slaving over a hot stove to put dinner on the table. Fast food outlets had not yet reached their prime and micro-waves were still tomorrow's dream. This book is NOT a cookbook, not unless you want to bring on a self-induced coronary! It is, however, one of the most hilarious books ever published.I can remember going to school and learning all about the "Canada Food Guide' and I imagine there is an equivalent guide in the U.S. as well. If one ate even half the recommended daily requirements, their size would be ten times that of Humpy Dumpty! "The Gallery of Regrettable Food" (and believe me, if you ate some of this stuff, you would regret it) brings to life a collection of advertisements and promotional material of yesteryear - some of which you will not believe! Food has never looked so morbid and falls somewhere between abstract art and the ambiguous splash of colour at the bottom of your compost bin! No wonder we are now overburdened with clogged arteries, high blood-sugar levels, out of whack hormones, immune systems gone awry, the horrors of cancer and endless unexplained aches and pains. If it is true that "we are what we eat," particularly the baby boomer generation, then our systems must be operating on maximum overload and ready to self-destruct! If you are a reader who grew up in the 50's era, buy the book; it is worth a million laughs and is sure to make your day.
Book Review: A belly laughing good time
Summary: 5 Stars
I'm not sure what catagory this book fits into truthfully...Its part cook book, part time capsule...part just plain horrifing to realize that people actually ate this stuff! Or that the advertisers thought these pictures would jump start anyone to actually purchase their product...the mind boggles. But it was a different world back than...and maybe these dreadful combo's had the worldly appeal that.... ceviche...or sushi...or gummy worms have today. Or the same appeal the the show *a cooks tour* has as we watch tony bourdaine suck down beating cobra hearts... perhaps considering that, the bacon shake looks almost mundane...
I can't help but admitting that I have bought more than a few *vintage* (read: old and tacky and never to be used for anything more than amusement) cook books on ebay... and i am sure that I enjoy them for the same reason that I just love this book. A glimpse at another time when I sit and shake my head and say "what were they thinking?" but when I read this book, its kind of like having company as the author has a funny running commentary going the whole time... and I don't feel quite so odd about my fascination for all of these retro....errrr... gourmet treats.
Altho I havent bought this as a gift I can see it being a great one for the right person. Perhaps someone who decorates with a retro twist...someone just starting out in a new apartment and you wnat to buy some cooking tools and a cookbook for (ok, a gag cook book for :) or someone who likes retro martini things..i think this would fit right in.
Book Review: Cooking the Books
Summary: 5 Stars
He shows off reproductions of illustrations for a cookbook devoted to toast, perhaps an extra bonus when you bought one of those newfangled toasters back in 1935. The booklet actually looks pretty stylish, and indeed copywriters in those days put ours to shame, but it inspires predictable hilarity in Lileks: "Ladies, serve toast, and well-groomed twins in tuxedos will want to have sex with you!"
Some of the ads are pretty grisly, "Creamed Brains on Toast," and the antiquated typefaces themselves reinscribe the note of terror, like one of those books such as WISCONSIN DEATH TRIP that show how every little corner of America is a minefield of horrid images. "TONGUE WITH CARROTS IN SPINACH NESTS." Somehow the garnish for the Kidney Loaf looks like something once lovely has died and decayed--Ophelia-like, it floats across the plate like a corpse down a moss-grown river.
Lilek's book has been a steady seller for five years now, and he's followed it up with a few others in the same vein, one satirizing parenting tips of the 1950s, the other exposing hideous examples of interior decoration from the same period. And still we have a sort of affection for these books, and for the hapless men and women who were trying to do their best, I suppose, in a culinary world from which there would be no escape as long as Americans continued to prefer flavorless, colorless food and fear the foreign.
After awhile one tires of the jokes and the pretend nausea. But for whole chapters at a time it's a laugh riot.
Book Review: Hideously Appealing
Summary: 4 Stars
Witty, amazing, hilarious, and yes, sometimes disgusting. James Lileks explores his love/hate/fear relationship with the bygone products of America's kitchens. From out of the misty depths of history comes a cavalcade of inexplicable boiled, greasy, molded, festively be-toothpicked horrors from various old cookbooks. Lileks' recipe: Start with a healthy portion of nostalgia, add a heaping helping of sarcasm, a dash of retro-graphics and typesetting, and a big chunk of fatty beefsteak. Boil and serve over badly photographed and unappetizing creamed whatsit. This book takes us into a parallel universe where pancakes taste better when made with 7UP and vegetables are only for display - IF YOU EAT THE ASPARAGUS - YER A FILTHY COMMIE! A world where bizarre Jell-O molds are the height of sophistication and men aren't men unless they can choke down an entire charred rump-roast and wash it down with a couple'a highballs. Taken from various sources, including promotional cookbooks given away free to homemakers by food products companies eager to drum up interest in their wares, this is not a book for the faint of heart. Some of the dishes shown here are really quite foul. But the writing is crisp and entertaining and Lileks manages to convey his fondness for the 'simpler times' these recipes evoke, even as they turn your stomach slightly. If you're looking for the recipes for the dishes presented here, may God have mercy on your soul. In fact, the only thing keeping me from giving this book 5 out of 5 stars is the food.