The Gift of Fear and Other Survival Signals that Protect Us From Violence
by Gavin de Becker
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Book Reviews of The Gift of Fear and Other Survival Signals that Protect Us From Violence
Book Review: Good backround information, but not a how-to book
Summary: 4 Stars
In this book, Gavin de Becker discusses personal safety from several aspects. There is information for people who are being followed by a stalker, parents who are afraid of their children, women who want to end a relationship safely, bosses who want to fire employees, and so on. Some of the information and advise is very practical, and can be directly utilized to increase your safety. Some of the issues handled is more theoretical in nature, and serves more as an backround information. The text is very interesting and easy to read, and not too scientific. Even with the more complicated subjects, the advise is very easy to understand, and it is illustrated with several stories from real life. There are some chapters that are not as useful (like the story on how de Becker's company found and helped police to apprehend a person who had killed several people and was stalking one of de Becker's clients), but still it is interesting to read about these thing as well.
I really wanted to give this book 5 stars, but there was something missing to grant the missing fifth star. Although there are plenty of advise applicable to common situations, I believe that this book is more theoretical in nature than a real how-to book. By reading this book, you really don't learn how to make accurate predictions yourself, but you rather learn how the professionals do it. Anyway, this book is an excellent way to start learning about the subject.
Book Review: Important for ANYONE and EVERYONE to Read!!!!
Summary: 5 Stars
This book could save your life.
It's very basic - go with your gut. Trust your instincts. Learn to listen to the danger signals your body gives you.
I am a real estate agent, and as such, find myself meeting with strangers often. Most of the time there is nothing unusual. However, a few times, I have gotten "a feeling" about someone. Something mildly inappropriate in an email, a strange phone conversation. These are the times my "spidey sense" kicks in and makes me a little wary.
I had such a feeling recently. Was going to be with a customer in a remote area, without many people around, and no cell signal. Even though I had never met him in person, he gave me strange feelings. It could be that he was perfectly harmless - but my gut was telling me "Do Not Go Alone."
So, I brought someone else with me. I was glad that I was not alone - because my feelings didn't change after meeting the person. Did it save my life? Who knows? All I know is that I am here to tell the story.
Read this book. Listen to it - and listen to your gut. Do not brush off feelings of nervousness or wariness as "only your imagination." It could very well be a matter of life, and death.
Be smart. Do not put yourself at risk. Perhaps the girl in the Boston hotel would be alive had she not been all alone and advertising her services on Craigslist.
Book Review: LISTEN to him...
Summary: 5 Stars
"This book can save your life"...I strongly believe EVERY women should go and buy or borrow this book ASAP. It is unbelievable at how brilliant this book is.
One of the things (but they're many) that really got to me was how Becker really put things in perspective. I'll never ever forget the example of the Antelope in the desert that only "senses" danger in a field; You've seen it on the Discovery Channel where the animals head jerks up and out of no where he runs. Then the next minute a lion or panther leaps out of it's hiding spot.
We are the only species that will ignore our built in danger detector because we don't want to come across as "rude". We were all raised to treat others with respect and not to come across as rude or uppity; though my experience is based on a upbringing in the south.
So here's my gift to you...
If you read this review and never go get the book always remember this. If ever you are about to get on an elevator or walking in a parking lot and you get just a tad bit of a "something isn't right" feeling please turn and walk away. Your conscience will TELL you when something is wrong, LISTEN to it! No matter how silly or ridiculous you may think it is.
We have all been given a gift...the gift of fear, and I'm hoping that we all (especially us ladies) learn it's always better to be safe than sorry.
Book Review: Great Saftey Tips - especially for women
Summary: 5 Stars
I really loved this book. I took away some great tips around reading non verbal queues. I especially like how he emphasiszes not only to "trust your instincts" but also walks the reader through deconstructing the clues that make sense of what your instincts are telling you.
I first read this book several years ago (before I had kids) and I guess the best thing I took away from this book, or the thing that affected me the most - even years later, is that now if a stranger approaches me while I'm out with my son (and if I get that uncomforatble feeling that something is not right) I have absolutely no qualms about removing myself and my child from the situation. I no longer worry about being 'nice'. de Becker makes a point, and I'm paraphrasing, but it was something like 'worst case scenario is that some stranger in the mall walks away thinking you're rude. best case scenario, is by not playing into the person, you could have just saved your child from being abducted by a predator'
I think you have to take it with a grain of salt though. No book anywhere, no matter how well written, will offer fool proof solutions to keep you safe from violence. This book is not Gospel. But it made me think. And it was an interesting, captivating read and I walked away better for having read it.
I also read Protecting the Gift, and liked that as well.
Book Review: The book could save your life....
Summary: 5 Stars
I recommend this book to more people than any other book and I am a reading addict. This book is already a classic and is required reading for anyone who wants to learn how to avoid violence and hooking up with a dangerous man. If you are in an abusive relationship, you need to read this book. If you are a parent then you ought to have your teens read this book. It could save their life.
A friend of mine saved her life by listening the creepy feeling (goose bumps and all) she got when she met her boyfriend's new room mate. One day she went by to see her boyfriend and only the new room mate was home and he encouraged her to come in the house.. My friend said no. The room mate was a serial killer who arrested a short time later. Listen to those creepy feelings.
I send a copy of the book to my nieces when they are 16 or 17 years old.
My 16 yr old niece told me that she was at a Borders bookstore looking up a title and an young man who was working there ..asked my niece if she needed any help..she politely said no thanks...he continued to come over and ask her over and over. Then she remembered this book and it stated when you tell someone no and they don't listen...they are not nice people.
This book is saving lives. I highly recommend it. Come to think of it..I should send the book to my nephews too.