The Memory Keeper's Daughter: A Novel
by Kim Edwards
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Book Reviews of The Memory Keeper's Daughter: A Novel
Book Review: Great premise, so-so writing.
Summary: 3 Stars
I contemplated for a while whether to give this review two or three stars; two and a half would be preferable. I decided to "round up," as I found the subject matter and overall feel of the book to be powerful enough to hold my attention and foster an anticipation of picking it back up after a long day. My knee-jerk reaction is that yes, I did like this novel. That said...
This is a potentially strong plot and fascinating glimpse at the power of one split-second decision, but it plays out suprisingly superficially. There is very little depth to any of the characters. It starts out well enough...Dr. David Henry is forced to deliver his and his wife Norah's twin babies in his empty clinic office aided only by one of his nurses, Caroline. He is shocked to discover that his and Norah's oh-so-perfect life and plans are about the shatter with the arrival of a "flawed" child (Down Syndrome.) Convinced that his decision is truly about sparing his wife the pain of seeing this child suffer severe physical ailments and possibly die very young, he instead tells her that she died mysteriously in birth and they are left with a single twin son (Paul, who is born perfect.) While Norah is heavily drugged, he hands the baby girl over to Caroline and instructs her to take her to the nearest institutional home and leave her. Caroline initially agrees to the plan, but upon observing the cold, dreary conditions of the institution impulsively decides to kidnap the child for herself, and sets off to a new city to raise little Phoebe as her own.
So there you have it. That's the whole premise, and it certainly is riveting enough to warrant enthusiastic reading, but it just never makes it entirely up to par. The connections between David's actions that one dark, frightening night were only loosely tied to the devastating effects the lie and secret truly had on his life and family. What was Norah REALLY feeling all those years? For all the thousands of descriptions of how a flower looked or a breeze felt on the skin, there were only one or two menions in which Norah briefly thought back to the child she believes died at birth. It never seemed to make any sense that a stillborn child she didn't even know was GOING to exist (they did not know she was carrying twins until Phoebe showed up--another unlikely scenario) would drive her to three decades of such bitterness toward David, drinking, and multiple affairs. Yes, David had become emotionally distant, but that is hardly an excuse for engaging in such destructive patterns herself. And the exact same could be said of Paul's youth, growing up without his twin, and the animosity he developed toward David when it was made very clear that David spent as much time doting on Paul as he could. Anyway, one thing that was very subtle and I give the author much credit for is what seemed to be the demonstration of how fragile David and Norah's original love really was. It was a shockingly fast whirlwind romance and marriage...they clearly knew nothing about how either would handle the darker sides of life and at the first test, they both failed quite miserably.
And on the other side of the story, Caroline, raising Phoebe, first alone then with her new husband, Al, remained suprisingly unmoved by the thought of another woman out there suffering through believing her daughter died at birth. As wonderful and loving as Caroline was toward Phoebe herself, I really wondered what part of her conscience she had to turn off in order to prevent any feelings of guilt or remorse for her part in the lie. We never know. It could be guessed that her past feelings for David, her love for him at the time of the birth, perhaps fed her feelings of entitlement toward raising the child of his that she wanted to give birth to herself; maybe she had some anger toward Norah for gliding in and snatching David away right when he was starting to notice her too...but that's only a theory and it would have been WONDERFUL to see that potential side of it.
Regarding the writing itself, it was problematic. For one thing, as many have mentioned here in other reviews, the writing gets lost in irrelevant, repetitive language that has nothing to do with the story at hand. We really don't need endless physical descriptions of EVERY woman who passes through the story, how someone's hair looks as the breeze flows through it, how many times a young woman slid a loose strand of hair behind her ear (three times described for one particular woman in the SAME chapter!) There are also far too many grammatical and timeline errors. For example, in the chapter when Caroline decides to move forward in a relationship with Al, the date is made very clear. Many chapters and years later, David's narration mentions that in his latest letter from Caroline, she (who'd been writing him about Phoebe's progress every few months) "had a new boyfriend." That "new" boyfriend had been her boyfriend for years at that point. Those types of errors are scattered about.
The end also fell flat. Key supporting characters who were mildly prevalent throughout the book (Bree, Al, Phoebe herself) were not included in the revelation, which was extremely disappointing and questionable. I wasn't, however, as disappointed by what happened with David...his fate actually made me feel quite sorry for him and his decades of pain. He had one brief year of joy, his first year with Norah, but there wasn't enough depth there for a lasting relationship and happiness, and it was unfortunate that he did not recognize that at the time, and as a result carried the emotional burden of the fallout throughout the rest of his life.
So yes, this book is readable, but I couldn't help but see many opportunities for depth that were missed. Instead, it was a lighter read than it should have been, and didn't do the great premise much justice. This was almost like a first or second draft, trying to flesh out a bigger story. Tighter writing and a better distribution of literary weight toward character versus description would have given this book the edge it needed to make it over the top.
Book Review: Intensely sad story
Summary: 3 Stars
This is, without a doubt, the saddest work of fiction I've ever read. I like the beginning of the book. Because it took place before I was born, some of the things such as medical technology were educational for me. But because I used to be an aide for developmentally disabled children, I had difficulty stepping back to a time when rearing your handicapped child at home was not routine. I cannot imagine giving my child away for any reason. I also cannot imagine a mother accepting that her child's remains were simply taken off by a friend to be buried at a private cemetery. Typically, there are days before a burial in which the body is prepared, a funeral and viewing are planned, a casket and burial clothing are chosen, etc. Personally, I'd have been wondering what he was protecting me from due to the rush to bury the body.
I grew up a child of the 70s and 80s in a town that had our state institution for the developmentally disabled. The only doctor in town was also the doctor for the institution. He was a pioneer in mainstreaming developmentally disabled children into the public school system alongside their "normal" peers. Growing up with it and then working with DD children when I was in college made me forget that it wasn't always like that. And, I'm grateful for the real parents who fought like the fictional Caroline did to pave the way for the way things are nowadays.
Certainly, if David had not given his daughter away, things would have been different. But, I also think that if he'd given Norah the subsequent children she wanted and needed, things would have been better. She loved being a mother. He didn't have to come clean with her about Phoebe, but could have said simply that he was afraid that the heart defect his sister had might have been what killed their daughter and that he'd rather adopt. But, not explaining his feelings at all was what started the downhill spiral for them.
I felt for Norah, but stopped liking her character after she rejected her husband's advances, but cheated on him every chance she got. If she didn't want it with him, why other men?
David's obsession with photography created problems in his relationship with his wife and it is comparable to her obsession with alcohol and impromptu road trips. They both throw themselves into their jobs as a way to avoid each other and avoid dealing with their individual pain. Too bad that he and Norah didn't get counseling to save their broken marriage.
I was also surprised that Caroline and Al didn't have children. She'd wanted her own children. True, Phoebe took a lot of her time, but many couples with a handicapped child have more children.
Doro's life before Caroline & Phoebe moved in wasn't really mentioned and I would have liked to know more about her. Was she married before? Obviously, she didn't have children. But, neither did her life begin at 50.
I loved Bree's character. She was a riot and often could see a situation with fresh, non-biased eyes. Despite her outlandishness, she was about the only genuine person of the whole lot except for Phoebe Norah's mother wasn't mentioned much after she remarried and moved away. There was no mention of Paul's interacting or visiting with his grandmother. I had to feel sorry for him not only for being reared an only child, but for not even having cousins.
After Paul turns a year old, the story that has such hope and potential takes an extremely sad and unexpected turn. No, Norah didn't have control over what happened to her daughter, but she was by no means a victim otherwise. But, she is made out to be one until she "takes control of her life" and gets a job. One can be proud of her for realizing that her alcoholism wasn't getting her any fulfillment and that she needed to do something to alleviate her depression. But, I fault her for putting her job ahead of her child, especially, and her marriage. It was the same with David's photography. Rather than family time or spouse time, he went to his dark room and she stayed at her office. Paul was left to fend for himself.
I can understand Paul's anger with his mother for her infidelity. But, I'm surprised that, over time, he mellows toward her and begins to hate his father for no apparent reason other than their difference of opinion of what Paul's future career should be.
I was surprised at Norah's outburst about the teenage girl that David rescues, thinking that she's his girlfriend. Here's a woman who's had countless boyfriends throughout her marriage and is upset because her husband rescues a forlorn young girl, whom she thinks might be his girlfriend, although he explains that she is not.
In the end, happiness and healing begin to take root. David's death was a convenient surprise. Convenient in that getting rid of him made it convenient for what really happened to Phoebe could be explained without difficulties, without turmoil, but left a lot of unanswered questions for the family. Carolyn going to Norah with the truth was a surprise, too, but a pleasant one.
Book Review: For such a rich subject...left me completely unmoved
Summary: 2 Stars
The initial premise of the book is terrific. We're in the '60s and a doctor finds himself in a situation on a snowy night in which he must deliver his own child, with the help of his nurse Caroline (who has a secret crush on him). The first child, Paul, is healthy, but the second, a girl, is born with Down's Syndrome. The doctor, David, is convinced his wife Norah will not be able to "handle" the trauma of having such a child, so he decides, in an instant, to hand the poor girl to Caroline and asks her to take it to a home for such children and leave it there, never to mention the girl again. He tells his wife that the daughter has died. Caroline runs to the home,finds it to be a hugely disturbing place, and then looking into the face of this new baby, decides she can love the girl and provide her with a life. She runs off with the baby, ready to start a new and uncertain life.
These initial scenes are fairly well done, and though the decision David makes is abhorrent today...it is somewhat tempered by the fact that in the '60s, we as a society weren't quite so compassionate or understanding of folks with Downs. His logic about sparing his wife is questionable, however, and Edwards fairly effectively shows that the gulf between David's initial guilt and wariness about being caught and Norah's grief at losing a child drives the couple further apart. Norah is not allowed to grieve in the way she wants...for example, she isn't allowed to see the body of her lost daughter...for obvious reasons.
Anyway, after this the book falls apart. Author Kim Edwards, it becomes clear, hasn't learned the lesson of "showing us" how people are feeling and thinking, but telling us. We are told over and over that David's secret has blanketed his family, that it's driven him apart from his wife and son. We never really understand specifically how. Does David just act guilty all the time? Does Norah never get over her depression? Is she unable to show love to her son because she wants her daughter? I found the book to be almost completely unconvincing psychologically.
Also, every character in the book (possibly excepting the daughter Phoebe) is hugely UNLIKEABLE and UNSYMPATHETIC. David is simply a pompous jerk. Her makes this huge decision and then can't understand how his lie might effect other people. He just wants his wife to "get over it." Problem is, we see right from the beginning of the book, before the lie even happens, that this is not a happy couple and not one that should ever have married. Norah, the wife, marries David apparently without love for him, and then resents him for being very successful and providing for her and her son the kind of life she married him to get. We also learn a great deal about David's childhood, and none of that rings very true either...the David we see as an adult isn't convincingly the man the young David would have grown up to be.
The son,Paul, is shown as a typical sullen teenager who is not understood by his overbearing father. He escapes to playing guitar, and what do you know...he's practically a genius at that instrument. He talks about music in a way that no real person ever would...only in a way that writer's who can't show us how a person feels but must have them "tell" us.
On the other side of the story, we have the nurse Caroline. She appears to be somewhat heroic, because she does risk a lot to provide a life for Phoebe. Yet we never see the day to day struggles of dealing with a child with Down's Syndrome. Some brief early scenes are all we get...but the structure of the story skips all the day to day details and we see only the "end result,"...which doesn't seem to have been all that difficult...except that the author "tells" us that it was. While Caroline isn't unsympathetic she's just kind of bland and passive.
At one point in the later part of the book, David returns to his old hometown and meets an unusual character. I don't want to spoil it...but let's just say that this person's actions are totally silly at first, and then later this person is clearly meant to cause a seismic shift in the dynamics of David's family...instead we just kind of scratch our heads and wonder at the strangeness of everyone's behavior. I wish I could tell you more...but if you manage to slog your way this far into the book, you should at least have some surprises left.
It took me FOREVER to get through this poorly written, overwraught book. I kept going because it was SUCH a bestseller and so many people liked it. I guess I just totally missed it. I realize I'm asking to get huge amounts of "unhelpful" ratings, but I feel there must be other lone voices out there like me...who just found the book deeply unsatisfactory.
The only reason it gets two stars instead of one is that the initial premise IS original and was done well enough to make me buy the darn book in the first place and continue reading it in the hopes that the author's imagination would once again provide redemption. No such luck.
Book Review: zic_quili@yahoo.fr
Summary: 4 Stars
To the author
Please be so nice to have a look at my opinion about this novel.
The style is quite nice, writing skills high, and anyway, I am not thoe one to be able to judge on the talent og the author which I guess is great.
Let me now comment the content of the novel, whose plot is quite interesting.
To be frank, while reading this movie, I began feeling bemused, and then, little by little, sad for this man, this doctor, until I got dismayed.
Really: why to do make this guy suffer so much from his initial sin, and make him be such a loser at the eyes of both his wife and son.
What's so wrong from him to his son to be despised and rejected?
Because he doesn't let his son fully dedicate his young life to play guitar and instead, demands him to first get good grades to get a degree and thus to get key to get a normal job in case his artistic life in a failure? Because he did not strike this man who had an affair with his wife on the beach? yes, it can look weak, dumb, but I understood it like kind of god punishment for not telling his wife the truth about their mongolian baby. Or because he came late to this special very important concert event for his son. But he is a doctor, very dedicated, conscientious placing life of his patients before his own family duty.
So what's so wrong for you, Kim Edwards, to destroy so much his image in his son mind and hearth. It think it is quite unfair.
As per his wife, yes, if we acknowledge woman intuition (and we can), he has a big responsibility in his wife depression and loss of enjoying life. But as you analyze very well, it is fully because he does not want his wife and son to live the same trauma as his own family and himself lived with his sick daughter and her terrible death while being a teenager.
Ok he also wants to protect himself and is not strong enough to overpass his fear and obsession, but is it so despicable, so sinful from his part?
Besides, you mentioned precisely that at that time, it was not rare to let mongolian children in a special care institution.
Then, when his wife reborns, helped by her wild daughter being a symbol of freedom (with all advantages and disadvantages you disclose little by little), thanks to her job, she evolves, grows, enjoys life and is successful in a way that definitely separate her from what she (and you) considers as a boring, rigid, close minded life full of good intentions, high (old fashioned) morality and principles.
What I think is the following:
You can not stand this type of man, who dedicates their life to (over)protect their families, to comply with their duty, and lack of dreams, fantasy, warmth and social generosity.
Moreover, I think you hate (I think you really hate) this type of men with this kind of old fashioned way of treating their wives, replicating the aging model of being a hard worker while wife is at home taking care of children and house.
This, for you, as honest and moral as a man might be, fully justifies to be betrayed by one's wife and to be despised/rejected by one's own children.
Even if you may not care, I'd like to stress that I personally fully disagree with it, and think this poor doctor' life evolves in a very unfair and shameful way in respect to his qualities and his eagerness to do things right.
Everybody makes mistakes, right? Why this accumulation of punches on his face, this unrelenting and pitiless loathing for him, letting him down, mere loser? Why to doom him, till his death, which is even not enough for you, since after death the slight pain felt by his wife gives up to pure anger and hatred when she knows about her hidden daughter, despite the nurse's explanation to (partly) justify this doomed doctor's choice.
I think that a strong figure in a family (father, grand-father) was quite similar to this doctor, and you are full of resentment for this person, and had secret hopes that he could be betrayed and fail his life end.
Or you are a mere feminist, obsessed by defending woman freedom and blindly rejecting any motherhood and old fashioned maternal behaviour.
Anyway, you succeeded in troubling me, and I felt very very sorry for this poor doctor, and his pathetic life evolution.
Why I got so mad and did not throw your book away at the moment I felt you began building his doom?
Because, and this is the worse and why i am still mad with you, you did it in a very talented way, given your fluid writing and the deep and nuanced analysis of your characters.
Thanks for reading my comment.
Book Review: The Memory Keeper's Daughter: great fiction and a great romance
Summary: 5 Stars
Normally I wouldn't touch a mix of fiction and romance, but this one is different. Really awesome!
My first daughter was born lifeless and gray-blue. "Like a seal," I remember thinking as the room went bright white and the doctor started suctioning her mouth. I pushed my wife's head back onto the pillow so she wouldn't be able to see the slick form down below. The oxygen tank hissed angrily. In the minutes that followed, as we waited and waited for my daughter to cry, all the hopes we'd stored up were suffocated under the weight of our new future that filled the room with fear.
Mercifully, few parents experience the shattering birth moment we did, and it may be that memories of my daughter's birth magnified the emotional impact of Kim Edwards's debut novel. But I think anyone would be struck by the extraordinary power and sympathy of The Memory Keeper's Daughter. The book opens during a snowstorm in Lexington, Ky., in 1964, when Norah Henry realizes that she's going into labor. The weather keeps her doctor from making it to the office in time, but her husband, David, is an orthopedic surgeon with enough experience to handle the situation. Under the partial influence of gas, Norah gives birth to a healthy baby boy, but as David tells her the happy news, another series of contractions begins. He quickly sedates his wife again, and she gives birth to another child, a girl with Down syndrome.
"Later," Edwards writes, "when he considered this night -- and he would think of it often, in the months and years to come: the turning point of his life, the moments around which everything else would always gather -- what he remembered was the silence in the room and the snow falling outside." In that quiet, terrifying moment, the grief and resentment caused by his sister's death at the age of 12 washes back over him, and he acts to preserve their vision of a happy future. He hands the baby to his nurse and asks her to take it to a home outside the city for handicapped children. When Norah awakens a few minutes later, he tells her their second baby was stillborn. "He had wanted to spare her," Edwards writes, "to protect her from loss and pain; he had not understood that loss would follow her regardless, as persistent and life-shaping as a stream of water. Nor had he anticipated his own grief, woven with the dark threads of his past."
Some ominously saccharine moments indicate that Edwards can slip into the treacly trade -- "The love was within her all the time, and its only renewal came from giving it away" -- but these gaffes are relatively infrequent, especially considering the presence of a handicapped character, who would, in less disciplined hands, be used to generate a waterfall of sentimental tears.
The episodic structure allows Edwards to survey these two families through the '60s, '70s and '80s, but frankly she's best when she moves slowly. The middle section skips through the years, obscuring the characters behind Significant Historical Moments: Women's Lib, Vietnam, Disability Rights. The novel begins to look as though it's been planned by a divorced dad: Every alternating weekend encounter has to be packed with a major activity. This structural tendency may be the effect of Edwards's experience as a short story writer. We drop in on these characters only on important days -- separated by years that included all the minutiae of real life. They're reduced to saying things like, "The last few years have meant so much to me." I kept thinking, No, show the true nature of these people on a few ordinary days.
Edwards is entirely capable of doing that, as the opening and closing sections of her novel show. This tragedy of a man who thinks he can control how lives are redirected is as moving as the story of his nurse, who knows that her love can bless a damaged life. In the end, it's not just that David made a mistake in a moment of crisis; it's that he never realized that parenthood is an infinite series of opportunities for redemption. Years after the choice he could never forgive himself, for, as Caroline tells him, "You missed a lot of heartache, sure. But David, you missed a lot of joy." Readers of The Memory Keeper's Daughter will find ample stores of both.