The Secret
by Rhonda Byrne
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Book Reviews of The Secret
Book Review: Secretly, I like this book
Summary: 3 Stars
On Tuesday evening one could have spotted me in the corner of my local Borders reading "The Secret." (And yeah, I did so secretively as I'm not one to readily promote self-help books and proclaim to fellow shoppers, "I need help and maybe this book will be my salvation!") Anyway, The Secret can be summed up in four words and one generic phrase: "thinking makes it so." I read this book with as much of an open mind as I could muster, and I'm glad I did. Still, I'll start with the things I disliked about the book:
--Any academic (or any person with an ounce of healthy skepticism) would be flipping the pages for references upon phrases along the lines of, "science proves positive thoughts are 60 times stronger than negative thoughts" or, "numerous studies show positive thoughts take effect faster than negative thoughts." Uhhhmmm... may I see these studies? Yeah, thought not.
--I couldn't help it. I snickered when they asked me to do the following: believe all my bills were checks and add a zero to the amount. Then, total my bills and say thank you several times for the money I've "received." (Nope, I couldn't make this stuff up.) So really, when the author claims I'll "receive" copious amounts of wealth just by willing it, I may as well mail myself Monopoly money and jump for joy at my "wealth." It's one thing to have gratitude for what you already possess and quite another to have gratitude for the imaginary. I'm all for being grateful for my super-cool family and awesome job... but I'm not going to thank my lucky stars for my hot Jaguar which, oh wait, doesn't exist ("yet," as the book would reassure me).
--In the weightlo- I mean, 'health' section, I don't feel that I could ever eat a pound of chocolate in one sitting and pretend it won't be detrimental to my rumpus. I think the science of nutrition is going to outweigh the Law of Attraction on this one.
--Which brings me to the way she adds disclaimers throughout her book. She actually does write that the people who can eat what they want and not gain a pound can do so through the law of attraction. In the small print she advocates basic nutrition advice like chewing your food slowly and eating in the present. Similarly, she wants the reader to make believe they're wealthy now so it's practically irrelevant what your bank account says since "je pense danc je suis."
The good?
--I truly believe if everyone adapted the positive thinking advocated in this book, the world would be a much better, happier place.
--Ok, I confess-- I've been trying for the past week to summon the "Law of Attraction" and it does work in strange ways. I've gotten better parking spots, found things in my purse I didn't know I had, I've gotten in touch with my creative side, and I love my body more than I did before. By applying a few concepts from this book I've been able to value what I do have and not sweat the small stuff. While I won't attribute this to "my inner magnetism drawing good things," it's very true that life is overall much easier with a good attitude. I look at the "science" behind the Law of Attraction akin to my view of horoscope: it's fun to believe, but I definitely question the hard science. Then again, what spiritual belief isn't wrought with scientific holes?
--I fully support the way she wants women (or men) to have a positive attitude towards their own bodies, even if they want to change its shape. I wish more women looked at themselves in the mirror and think how gorgeous they look instead of focusing on their stomach.
--I agree that contractions (don't, can't, won't, etc) make a person focus more on the very thing one tries to negate instead of the more positive alternative. For example, "I won't smoke today" will elicit the desire to smoke more than "I like running" (should that be the desired alternative to smoking).
--"The Secret" brings a lot of generic aphorisms like "thinking makes it so" and "worry is a misuse of the imagination" into something a little more cohesive and tangible.
This book promises the reader anything their heart desires with a simple change of attitude. That's quite a tall order. With everything to gain and nothing to lose, I don't think it hurts to adopt a new perspective and seeing what happens. I know I've been pleasantly surprised.
Book Review: Be Kind to Yourself and Others...
Summary: 1 Stars
Okay, somewhere in this 'blockbuster' book, we should hear that, right? Well sort of. But do it because of the expected reward not for the act itself. When I see this book being roundly endorsed by thousands of people, it makes me wonder where we have gone wrong in our thinking. Yes, horribly wrong.
As a believer in and teacher of positive thinking and PMA, it makes me sick to think "The Secret" is being compared with the writings of Maxwell Maltz, W. Clement Stone, Dale Carnegie, or Earl Nightingale. I am THOROUGHLY acquainted with these gentlemen's works and there is not one place where they say or imply that a victim of tragedy is to blame for the occurence. Not one.
But according to Ms. Byrne, those killed by suicide bombers on 9/11 attracted that tragedy. As well as those with AIDS, those who have been raped, those with cancer, victims of molestation, victims of tornadoes, floods, hurricanes, famines, oppresive governments, dictatorships, etc. And here people are literally buying that notion. But let's go deeper.
If we adopt the ideas of "The Secret" then when someone is hurt profoundly by life in whatever form, we can sit back and say 'Well, after all they attracted it to themselves." We don't have to care. We don't have to empathize or sympathize, and we get the feeling of being superior because, after all, that didn't happen to us.
Going deeper still, where would we be as a society if everyone practiced "The Secret?" There would be no fire or police officers. Too negative. Ditto doctors, psychologists, and clergy. Why? The answer is obvious. There is a lot of 'negativity' connected with those professions and vocations. And according to Byrne, we shouldn't look at what we don't want to manifest in our own lives. Same with non-professionals. See someone drowning? Turn your head. Don't let the negativity be part of your conciousness. See a homeless person? Turn away-don't be part of what you don't want to see manifested in your life.
Does it get any meaner than that? And to think that so-called motivational gurus like Bob Proctor, Denis Waitley, and others signed onto this teaching shows me how low they will go for a buck. The blatant selfishness and insensitivity of the book/DVD is sickening. As a matter of fact, it amazes me that Rhonda Byrne can lay her head on the pillow at night. I suppose a fat back account makes up for it.
If you want true motivation and inspiration consider these: "You may have failed but that does not make you a failure any more than striking the wrong key on a typewriter makes it worthless"-Maxwell Maltz. "Change your thoughts and you change your world"-Norman Vincent Peale. "Conceive it, believe it, and achieve it"-W. Clement Stone. "We become what we think about"-Earl Nightingale. "Your greatest power lies in your ability to choose."-J. Martin Kohe. "The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their attitudes of mind."-William James.
None of the above-mentioned people have DVD's with smoke, hundred foot genies, magic lamps, or special effects as does "The Secret." What they DO offer is truly practical and sincere advice for bettering your life and the lives of those with whom you come into contact. The law of attraction as Rhonda Byrne describes it is a bogus ripoff of the great thinkers of the past with her cartoonish spin on it.
In an increasingly coarse and hardened world all of us DO need inspiration and to learn to use our minds and change our attitudes. What we don't need is anything which encourages us to think less and less of other people and treat their suffering as something self-inflicted thereby diminishing not only their pain, but their humanity. Even religious fundamentalists are kinder in attributing suffering to a devil or demons. And believe me, there is not very much kindness in a fundamentalist/literalist.
So as far as this book goes? Pass it by. It's hype, trickery, mumbo-jumbo, and snake-oil. It is the product of brilliant marketing and an author who has perveted some of the worlds greatest ideas. The corruption of great philosophies and ideas would be bad enough, but this book is also cruel at its very essence.
Book Review: I have a problem with this book
Summary: 1 Stars
Okay, the problem I have with this book, is that it claims that we attract both positive and negative events in our lives. So if I got in an accident two years ago and was sued for $30,000 I attracted that upon myself. Okay, that's fine, but what about when I was 5 and was molested by a man, did I attract that upon me too? What about my grandparents living out amazing lives and all of the sudden being struck by world war 2 and were forced to go through hell, did they attract that upon themselves? What about this woman I know who lost all of her adorable 4 kids in a fire. She raised them with such love, gave them education working hard day after day! Paris Hilton on the other hand must have thought something really positive for having all that she has and doing nothing! So what this book offers, is Eastern belief, similar to Hinduism and all of that which says that 'you're responsible for your destiny! You are the god of your life! There is no other force that is responsible for you life, but you!' That's where I have a problem with this book! Any of you who know the book of Job from the Old Testament will know that God took everything away from him, but because Job loved God still, God gave Job everything back twice as much. I know it's just the story, but I do believe that God, no other force permits or blocks things from happening in our lives. Sometimes things dont' seem fair. For example, why would a child be born blind and deaf? I really do believe that such children are angels brought by God into our world for us to learn from! I know a family who changed their corrupt ways after they had a child born with down syndrome. They're the happiest and nicest people because of that kid now. God will not forget tears, or suffer. God blesses those who cry and punishes those who cause the crying. When my uncle was working one day on a construction, he heard a voice that told him to move away from that spot he was standing at, and as soon as he did, it blew up. There was no one there, but the voice was so clear. All because he simply prays every morning to start out his day in blessings. This book makes people ask more "spiritual" questions as if it was a good thing. But it's not. It's a hook! If you start asking more question on the lives and examples of those innocent people's suffering I brought up above, the answer would be: "There is a past life, those people must have done something to attract trouble in their next life." See? It gets you deeper and deeper into all this mumbo-jumbo crap! The question is then, if there is a past life, but there is no God (remember, God has "forsaken" you and you are responsible to attract all the goodness to yourself now), who in the world will transfer you safely from your dead body into a new body? The universe? I got news for you! The universe, even though big, is made of rocks and gas, and matter just like the rest of us. All a creation! All was created by God! God so loved the world that He gave his only Son to die and pay for our sins, for our unbeliefs, for our spirit of Eve, wanting knowledge that is false, that is polluted. God has mercy and forgives. None of these type books made me happy! Only when I went back to the truth, and rebuild my relationship with God, that's when things started to make sense and the world appeared more clear, because God longs for us, He longs to make your life beautiful! This book will only make you live like in some kind of dream, some illusion... You will stress out trying to think positive, when all you have to do is trust God who knows every number of your hairs on your head! Jesus says that we should trust God, for He loves us so much more than the birds or the flowers in the fields that get nurtured from Him. So don't be mad at me for giving this book only one star! Drink the water of life, drink the word of God, and you will be wise and rich and anything you want for the will of God! I am not inviting you to be religious. I don't like the word religion. I don't like religious people. I've been kicked out of a church before, and was accepted and loved at another. So I know there are dead churches but there are also alive churches. But "The Secret" will rub you off of your money, and will only add more illusion to your already stressed out mind.
Book Review: More dangerous than helpful
Summary: 2 Stars
You're probably not going to read this, because there are already over 1500 reviews, but I'm going to write this anyway, to vent.
I wanted to like this book. I am a certified hypnotherapist, and I wanted to be able to refer a best selling book to my clients about the power of visualization and positive thinking. These are great tools to re-framing your life, but only when used in conjunction with other life plans. Visualization and positive thinking should be used as the first step - motivation - toward a thoughtful, realistic, attainable goal.
This book somehow stretches one simplistic, absurd premise to 198 pages, mostly by quoting self-proclaimed gurus discussing completely unsubstantiated ideas. These "experts" have titles such as life coach, transformation specialist, etc. Getting paid to tell people how to change their lives does not in itself make you an expert. Nor does repeated assertion make an idea true. Where is the evidence that thoughts have frequencies? Ms. Byrne even managed to find some sort of quantum physicist who makes a loose connection between the physical laws of the universe and her magical thinking.
This book was not just inaccurate and a waste of time, but it was offensive and potentially harmful. In attempting to make a point that bad things happen to you because you think bad things, one of the "experts" tried to justify large-scale tragedies such as the holocaust. He explained that this group of millions of innocent victims all shared the same negative frequency of thought. So now, these poor victims not only have the tragic fate of being senselessly and brutally murdered, but they are to be held accountable for bringing this fate onto themselves. What about the tragedy of 9-11? All those people in the WTC were on the same negative frequency that day? Maybe it was the cafeteria food?
This book purports that one can lose weight by simply visualizing and wishing that they could be like those thin people who eat anything they want and never lose weight. I am beyond words on this one. All I can say is this - Rhonda, find me one fat person who lost weight without changing their diet or exercise, and not having surgery. Just one.
Logically, the "secret" falls apart. What if Person A's greatest wish is to marry Person B. And Person B's greatest wish is for Person A to break up with them. They both follow the rules of the Secret. Who wins?
Same thing, with two football teams at the Super Bowl. They're all using the Secret to visualize winning the game. How does the universe decide which positive thoughts to grant?
It is misleading and cruel to promise people that they can visualize into their lives millions of dollars, new homes, new cars, etc. and that these items will magically appear with no other action needed. What about higher education? Or hard work? If I want to be a doctor, don't I need to go to med school?
It is ridiculous and cruel to promise people that they can visualize cures for terminal disease. While I believe a positive attitude is essential to pursue optimum health, I don't believe in miracles. Sorry, I just don't. I am not about to add to the grief of families who have lost a loved one to cancer by telling them that their loved one did not do a good enough job of visualizing good health.
I would like to see Ms. Byrne deliver her message to a children's cancer ward, or those locked up on death row.
Presumably, there are people using the Secret to wish for things beyond selfish materialistic bling. Some people might even be wishing for world peace. Or a cure for cancer. So if those people are all using the Secret correctly, and are all on the same wavelength, why hasn't any of those things occurred?
The first year the play "Peter Pan" was performed in England, the Darling children were taught to fly simply by thinking happy thoughts. However, realizing this might possibly lead real children into jumping out of high windows, author J.M. Barrie introduced the necessity of fairy dust in the second season. The Secret is Peter Pan without the fairy dust - outrageously ungrounded, misleading, and jeapardous.
Book Review: So, what's 'The Secret'?
Summary: 4 Stars
'The Secret' is another name for the Law of Attraction, and the name of the book by Rhonda Byrne that helps to simplify this Law. This book was put together with quotes and contributions from many accomplished, successful contemporaries and figures of the past, with the purpose of helping people learn how to use the Law, thereby empowering themselves and enriching their lives.
This is, by no means, a new concept! The book makes this quite clear, with many references to both books and personalities that have taught principles related to the Law of Attraction. This book, however, is a more accessible, modern, an easily understood explanation of this Law than you might find elsewhere. 'The Secret' is small (around 200 pages), though the information might take awhile to fully digest and interpret.
In life, there are people who are successful, people who struggle, and those who are stuck flip-flopping between the two. Of course, the desirable position is one of success! But, how does one go about it? For starters, 'The Secret' says that a person's thoughts have immense power over the shape of their lives. When you want your life to go in a positive direction, you should think positively! But...this isn't particularly easy for most people! The point of this book is to guide the reader in understanding how to make the Law of Attraction work in their favor. We already use it every day, perhaps without knowing it. Bob Doyle, one of the 'Secret Teachers' featured in the book, says: "Most of us attract by default. We just think that we don't have any control over it. Our thoughts and feelings are on autopilot, and so everything is brought to us by default." Once you've got a handle on your thoughts, you can manipulate your circumstances for better or worse; the Law doesn't discriminate based on what's negative or positive when it delivers what you focus on the most!
The goal is to get to the point where you are consciously striving to better your circumstances. 1) Ask, 2) Believe, and 3) Receive are the steps 'The Secret' recommends taking when one really wants something in their life. 'The Secret' emphasizes that having a deep desire and belief in something is more important than worrying and trying to figure out exactly how something is going to happen. The hard part is having faith something that hasn't manifested itself yet!
Some people might think that the principles of 'The Secret' are selfish and greedy. But, shouldn't every human being have the opportunity to lead a full and happy life? The Secret' emphasizes generosity (see the chapter on 'The Secret to Money', page 107) because part of the benefit of self-empowerment is that you can share your abundance with everyone around you and improve their lives, as well as your own. I don't interpret 'The Secret' as advocating a life of lazy, unproductive behavior. In order to have a 'total transformation' in your life, you've got to be applying this Law in all of the major areas (money, relationships, health, etc.), right down to the smallest details.
People who are wanting to use it to satisfy frivolous whims might succeed in doing so, but will those meager accomplishments lead to lasting happiness? I think not.
If this 'Secret' is the key to unlocking the potential of your life, then why did I give this book 4 stars instead of 5? Not all of the answers are going to be found here. I recommend that the reader explores other similar works (like Napoleon Hill's Think and Grow Rich!: The Original Version, Restored and Revised) to motivate and help them along. There are people who claim that 'The Secret' has changed their lives. Yes, it is true that a book (or a mentor, a piece of music, etc.) can have quite a profound impact on someone's life. But, a given person has to find something within of themselves that allows them to carry out the necessary steps for improvement. Books, such as this one, can be tools in conjuring up what you've already got inside! All you need is the desire, the drive, and the ambition!