The Twilight Saga Collection
by Stephenie Meyer
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Book Reviews of The Twilight Saga Collection
Book Review: These books are the best I've ever read!
Summary: 1 Stars
Speechless! I totally cried like a little baby at the end of the final book, "Breaking Dawn". Why? Becasue such a beautiful and completely original series had ended! Had Stephenie Meyer, a blessed angel from heaven, come to our wretched planet to save our lives with this beautifully amazing book series? These books are amazing and also very educational!!!!
I didn't become a real man until I read "Twilight", which was a blueprint for life itself for guys and girls! I mean, as a guy, I learned that if I meet a beautiful girl, no matter her personality, I shouls instantly make her my girlfriend! I also realized that geeky girls suck and that I should only date the girls that are beautiful! What great advice. I also realized that I should watch her in her sleep every night because that's what a good boyfriend does, right? And I also found out that I should be controlling and I should also make her do only what I want her to do, and that she shouldn't make her own decisions and state her opinions, because, well, guys are the only perfect people!
New Moon inspired me so much too!!!!! I mean, I am totally going to make my daughter like Bella, the blueprint for all teenage girl! I mean, when she gets dumped, it's OK for her to go comatose for four months, and I also was taught that it's acceptable for girls to suicidal and do stupid things that could get themselves killed if they miss their man. Because really, girls are nothing without their men! WHen I have children one day, I will teach them that.
Eclipse was amazing and inspirational! I learned that if my girlfriencd resists me, I should force myself on her! And that if a creepy werewolf guy tries to sexually assault my daughter, then that's a good thing! I have never been so moved to tears. Oh, and Breaking Dawn is the most inspirational book!!!!! I mean, say, I'm a vampire. Us vampires only have one power. Well guess what, when my wife becomes a vampire, she's so special, she gets 2 POWERS, one of them being a love shield!!!!!! And also, I learned that sex is the only reason to live life! I currently have plans to blow off college for having hot sex with my girlfriend!!!!
I also learned writing techniques from this! I will now make paragraph-long sentences and break my own rules for my future books! Like, a vampire has no hormonal fluid yet gets a girl pregnant! That's completely logical!!!!
I have never been moved so much by a series. Since I have no life, I will read the books over and over and preach about how amazing they are! And also, if I blindly give everything I see 5 stars, then I I'll get helpful votes and join the Vine Program!
Book Review: The Twilight Saga Collection
Summary: 5 Stars
I am, none the less, one of your newest fans and truly a young "at heart" adventurer. Needless to say after more than twenty years of hibernation I finally broke down and started reading again, of course, brought back to "life" by the new wave of vampires, werewolves and mortals (did you guess ?? that would be the Twilight series).
I was born in Bucharest, Romania and as you know Europe still has first place in romantic places, legends and lore and YES ... the vampirian Transylvania that is my birth place.
I declare, I am a loyal Borders customer but the prices sometimes are outside my 'book' budget left over after my teen 'vampires' suck me dry. But none the less they ought to make me use a time card and get on their payroll as often as I visit that store and spent more money than any woman my age should ... on youth books.
I watched the Twilight movie with my teen daughter, loved it and the sound track, and started to buy the books for my friends teens before I even read them. As skeptical as a woman my age can be about teen books, I purchased the first volume, with my coupon, allowing me a $20.00 budget and telling myself that it would not be such a bad investment if I don't like it. I can always passed it down to my "young adults".
I cracked the book open and ... it took me one week and "almost like heroin" withdrawal when I finished the first one and craved for more, wondering how could I "not like" books with such cool cover graphics that have a special meaning. All read eyed, sweaty palms and shivering from the adventure that sucked me in and left me drained of energy at the end. Had to go for a walk on the bike path and regroup my thoughts listening to the Twilight sound track and wishing that a New Moon movie open soon, very soon ...
My daughter thought I was possesed, she kept on passing my bedroom door staring at me while I was reading motionless on the covers of my bed. I barely lifted my eyes from the books and gave her an inquisitive glance. 'Mom' she said 'I didn't know you read books' ... I was a little dissapointed in myself, since my daughter is 17 and YES, she never saw me reading a book in 'her' life. I used to read four at a time but when my children came into my life ... all of my needs and wants were forgotten. So, for all the mom's out there, young at heart and tired of 'romance' books ... try teen adventure books (I also recommend The Mortal Instruments by Cassandra Clare) it would bring new vibrations to your heart.
Book Review: Missed the Mark for Me
Summary: 1 Stars
After all the hype, and a cost effective opportunity to experience this series, I jumped at it. After all, I have a fondness for the paranormal books that have popped up, everything from Poppy Z Brite to the Black Dagger books, Southern Vampire books, Immortals After Dark, Sunshine, et al. I wanted some light reading, wasn't looking necessarily for deep themes, or really much beyond entertainment.
I did watch the movie prior to starting the books, which I rarely do, but felt that hopefully some of the elements that I was dissatisfied with in the film Twilight would be rectified in the books. Sadly, after reading all four in a marathon session, I find that those elements that I was unhappy with seem to have originated with the source material. There are a plethora of detailed, complex reviews from other who were dissatisfied for various reasons, as as from people who have been quite satisfied. For myself, probably the most egregious part was the utter lack of character that I got from Bella. I don't know this girl, despite dragging myself through 3 years of her life, in mostly first person, and I have no sympathy, nor empathy for her. She felt like a placeholder, very poorly fleshed out. There were hints of things: talking about feeling out of place in the world, her unhappiness with everything, but that was the extent. It's as if while reading I kept trying to strike a tuning fork and only got clanks, no resonance.
Somewhere after Twilight with genuine interest I simply slogged through the text, hoping against hope that the task I had set for myself would end at some point. It was an exercise in control by the end of the first part of Breaking Dawn, as I became devoid of interest. The comparison has been made to fanfiction, and I cannot disagree, particularly as the "special powers," creepy progeny and minimal conflict evolved. Yes, I also agree with the "Mary Sue" references that have been bandied about.
I will say, maybe I missed the point, maybe my tastes have been changed or jaded by my other reading, but in good conscience, I don't feel comfortable recommending these books to the tween-teenage audience that they seem to be marketed to. There are a plethora of books that have compelling characters, interesting plots, aspects of the paranormal, and remain age appropriate. Diana Wynn Jones, Garth Nix, Tamora Pierce, Robin McKinley, Patricia McKillip are authors I still have on my shelves, and still reread. I cannot say the same about what I have seen thus far from Ms. Meyer.
Book Review: Meyer vamps contaminate gene pool!!!
Summary: 1 Stars
I have just spent a weekend reading the Stephenie Meyer vampire series. I DO NOT SEE WHAT GROWN WOMEN SEE IN THESE BOOKS.
The writing reflects, at best, a fourth grade reading level; the second and third books sometimes repeat, word-for-word, descriptions from their predecessors; the characters' abilities are inconsistent between the books, particularly in the explanations of which vampires can "see" into the "La Push" Indian reservation between books two and three.
Most of the characters are high school age. The male lead is a stalker who shows all the signs of becoming an abusive mate (isolation of his companion from her friends; a century's worth of anger issues; risky behavior -- including poor driving skills). The protagonist is the product of a father too stupid to boil spaghetti but smart enough to be a police chief (comforting? not!) and a self-serving, childish mother. Bella has obviously inherited her parents' qualities, stupidly jumping off cliffs and selfishly manipulating her father and taking advantage of her "human" friends. Aside from blood the vampires consume, no one seems to eat anything in these novels except pizza, spaghetti and hot dogs. Maybe the characters' cognitive abilities are warped from a lack of proper nutrition.
I almost overlooked my irritation at the American reading public. Where is the public outcry that accompanied the marketing success of the Harry Potter books? Where were the placard-wielding protesters at this book series' movie debut?
Are vampires and werewolves not as anti-religious as midget magicians? Is it OK for an American author to publish a best-selling Young Reader series, but not OK for a British author to do so? Or does the "religious right" not want to run a stake through the heart of one of its own? Is this depiction of the afterlife acceptable to the Mormon background which produced its author?
I envy Stephenie Meyer's ability to make suck money out of the American marketplace, but I don't envy her writing skills. She doesn't have any.
If I can stand losing another four hours of my life, I have one book left to go. Without reading it, I don't know if the series will remain true to the belief that vampires cannot procreate. I can only hope it maintains this tradition because, if vapid stupidity is hereditary, Edward and Bella do NOT need to contaminate the gene pool! I think any self-respecting vampire -- and adult, female reader -- would agree.
Book Review: Make it Stop.
Summary: 1 Stars
This series is horribly written, and not only this, but the plot and characters leave much to be desired.
I give props for only two reasons. One, although i miss a vampire's fear of the sun, the sparkling idea was...unique... Two, many of the children i work with hated reading until this series came out, although i had to constantly teach them the evils of stalking, invading another's personal space for one's own needs, and getting in cars with boys, it did get them to read something and i am grateful for that.
The down side to this series is too great a list to put into 300 words, so i will focus on the biggest issues for those who may avoid wasting money due to this review and others of the 'low star' persuasion.
1) The Plot- Is rather...how should i put this...like any other Romance novel you could pick up in the grocery store. Some words to describe it: Expected, Dull, Dragged Out, Angsty. And if i may say so, it sounded much like the inner wishes of a very sick minded, twisted, standard-less girl who would have done much better in the decades before Women's Suffrage where she would have been pleased to be nothing more than any man-off-the-street's sexual pleasure, left for dead the next day, or locked away until he needed her again.
2) The Characters- Ones you could pull out of any one Archetype with no deeper characteristics than what you see on the surface. A few words that should cover them all: Needy, Clingy, Angsty. Except for Alice, i will say that i stayed with the book solely for her.
3) The Underlying Message- Underneath and inbetween the lines the book says nothing more than "It's ok to stalk others because you know they're the one, or they're your sick minded weakness", "It's ok to push aside all that i am for another's love", "Throw yourself at a person enough times and you'll get what you want", and "Misery loves company, so if i'm as angsty as humanely possible, i'll get a significant other."
In short: Do not buy this series if you respect and wish to keep your mind in working condition. If your child, or in my case, children you work with do not wish to read, find another book. I reccomend something by Michael Scott or Vivian Vande Velde if they've got a thing for vampires.
Save yourself the trouble of having to cleanse your mind and anyone elses who might suffer from your buying of this series.