Tweak: Growing Up on Methamphetamines

Tweak: Growing Up on Methamphetamines
by Nic Sheff

Tweak: Growing Up on Methamphetamines
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Book Summary Information

Author: Nic Sheff
Edition: Hardcover
Audio: English (Original Language); English (Unknown); English (Published)
Published: 2008-02-19
ISBN: 1416913629
Number of pages: 336
Reading Level: Young Adult
Publisher: Ginee Seo Books

Book Reviews of Tweak: Growing Up on Methamphetamines

Book Review: Good story. Sloppy telling.
Summary: 2 Stars

I'm so conflicted about rating/reviewing this book. I want to separate the actual story being told from the mechanics of the story-telling. I want to separate my personal feelings about the person who IS Nic Sheff (at least, as I perceive him through his and his father's writing) from the story (I think) he is trying to tell... and therein lay the problem.

In no particular order, here are problems I had reading "Tweak."
1.) As one of his counselors mentions, Nic seems removed from his own story. He tells the story as if it's happening to someone else. This could make sense, as a coping mechanism - after all, the guy did experience trauma - but I found myself wondering, due to the disconnect between the story and its 'teller,' if things actually happened the way he says they did. Or was he embellishing, in the tradition of James Frey?
2.) The story-telling was shallow, flat. In a way, perhaps because of his repeated use of "and whatever," I found his story was so nonchalantly (sloppily, lazily) told that I questioned, "If this kid doesn't care about his own journey, why should I?"
3.) The editing was horrendous... or non-existent. I kept trying to make excuses for Nic, telling myself, "He repeats, repeats, repeats himself and jumps around in his recall of events because that is how the chemical-addled, damaged brain of a speed-freak and junkie works; he's simply capturing the mania in the cadence of his writing." That only took me so far, though. I could not get past repeated misuse of "than" (it should have been "then"). I could only tolerate "and/or whatever" so long (eventually, I'd just skip over it, as I did when I saw any word repeated 3 times). While the editing I think I would have preferred would have changed the character of the story, I think some simple "clean-up" of Nic's text would have worked wonders for the final product.
4.) Sobriety and recovery seem to be afterthoughts, or like footnotes, to Nic's story of descent into hell. While I did comment on what seems like Nic's lack of connection to his own story, I did sense an intimacy/authenticity in the sections detailing drug binges (and the feelings he gets from them) that I didn't sense any time he spoke of sobriety (esp. in his epilogue). While I understand the power, the sensory nature (and, thus, the body's sensory memory) of drug use, I felt like the publishing of this book may have been a bit premature (should he have waited until he had more time clean under his belt? more time to reflect on and process both use and non-use and the role of drugs in his life?). Perhaps he had to get it out now, if he was to get it out at all, because his father had published his "Beautiful Boy," and what better way to ensure book sales than to follow on the bootheels of your father's book about the same series of events? In any case, I'm still trying to figure out why Nic had his story published now. What was his purpose? Who was his intended audience?

In the end, I DO think Nic's story is worth telling. Unfortunately, I think it was done mostly in a superficial and self-indulgent way. I found myself thinking that the problems/complaints Nic had/has come from an extremely privileged place (making him, at least slightly, an unlikable character). Frankly, he sounded spoiled and whiny a good deal of the time, which made identification (sympahty/empathy) with his character and his struggle difficult. Finally, I can't help but wonder if this book made it to publication solely because of who his parents are.

This book is disappointing, and I'm SO glad I borrowed it from the library instead of buying it. While there are a few nuggets of insight and cosmic revelations in here, I'd be willing to bet there's another story out there that captures the same ones but does so in a text that's less excruciating to read.

All I hope is that Nic gives his sobriety more attention and effort than he gave to "Tweak: Growing up on Methamphetamines."

Summary of Tweak: Growing Up on Methamphetamines

Nic Sheff was drunk for the first time at age eleven. In the years that followed, he would regularly smoke pot, do cocaine and Ecstasy, and develop addictions to crystal meth and heroin. Even so, he felt like he would always be able to quit and put his life together whenever he needed to. It took a violent relapse one summer in California to convince him otherwise. In a voice that is raw and honest, Nic spares no detail in telling us the compelling, heartbreaking, and true story of his relapse and the road to recovery. As we watch Nic plunge the mental and physical depths of drug addiction, he paints a picture for us of a person at odds with his past, with his family, with his substances, and with himself. It's a harrowing portrait -- but not one without hope.

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